It's funny, how those of us in the derby recapping biz often complain about the recaps themselves. Roller derby, much like NASCAR, focuses on people traveling really fast while moving in left-handed circles. Sure there's different stratagems that can be used, but at its core it's the same: skate fast and avoid being hit.
All rather routine business until I'm tasked with explaining what "Ultra Murder Roller Derby Presents… A Roller Derby Christmas Story" was. The Christmas Story theme is obvious, right down to the teams: the Red Ryders (uh, red) vs the Ralphies (pink), but the hosting league was, at the time, indeterminate. Ex-Pinellas County Roller Girls, the St. Pete area now has a new(er) league to claim: the Deadly Rival Roller Derby. So new, in fact, that they didn't even have a name for the bout, instead setting up a suggestion table!
Newness aside, it was still the same old (first year) roller derby action we've come to love. As many of these girls have only been skating a year, four bouts to be exact (five if you count the travel blow-out bout against the Lakeland Rockabilly Rebels, tactically the bout was elementary. The girls are still learning when one should call a jam off early, how to track what the pack is doing while they're jamming, and all the million other factors that one has to process when one is skating. That said, there has been noticeable improvements.
The biggest improvement is that the girls are clearly a lot more comfortable skating out there. The Ralphies boasting two potent, and homegrown, jammers: Smash A Licious and Sindy Lou Who. (Sindy also having the distinction of representing two Christmas movies tonight.) Each were tied point-wise, at 27 apiece, collectively making up the majority of the Ralphies' 101 points. (The majority of the rest were provided by ex-Tampa Bay Derby Darlin Freak Show; in her first bout since returning after years overseas.)
The Red Ryders, while ultimately losing, also did use a wider range of jammers. Similar to the Ralphies' Sindy Lou Who, who's been dangerous since the league began, the Red Ryders' Brawl Marx continued her dominance on the track with 21 points total. Jammers Shoe Whore and Ninja Monkey both made their marks at 11 and 13 respectively. Ninja placed a stronger emphasis tonight on her blocking skills; managing to squeeze in one brutal 13 point jam at the end. The night's best effort(s) came from Kat von Kittie, who was charged with jamming against Freak Show throughout the second half. While this was disastrous for Kat point-wise, by the end of the night she was sneaking in a lead jammer here and there; bruised but not beaten.
Defensively, both teams have grown. Each side now equally capable of splitting the pack, as well as having a much tighter grasp on calling off jams early. The actual, physical, blocking is coming right along, with hits now being traded by the non-pivot players on both sides.
Though the Red Ryders put up a valiant fight, the Sindy Lou Who/Freak Show team pushed the Ralphies ahead for the win: 101-71. MVPs being given to the Red Ryders' Spyro Nova for jamming, and Ghoula Lola for blocking. And accolades going to Freak Show and CU Next Tuesday, on the Ralphies, for their jamming and blocking abilities.
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