Sometimes newlywed couples have a hard time deciding where to plant their feet. We have talked a lot about marital issues and stressors more so than the importance of a loving community that promotes healthy marriage. There are several levels of community of course, that influence our marriages. Whether or not you have a church community is a big deal, maybe you’re a member of a golf or bowling community.
Wichita Falls offers so many things that promote healthy relationships; you just have to look for them. There is a cycling community of people, several motorcycle groups that do a lot for our community. Despite popular belief and water restrictions, Wichita Falls can be a great wholesome, marriage friendly community.
It is possible that the community relations, the company you keep, can influence your marriage. We have museums, art galleries and book club communities that promote healthy relationships. Of course if you consider yourself as to hip, slick and cool to dare get involved in any of that. There is a community of people who just spend time in the parks, either way; your marriage has to be important enough to be open-minded to things.
Sheppard Air Force Base has a great marriage friendly military community, these couples can be seen everywhere. They know the importance of supporting each other, knowing, being married to the service is not easy and comes with a lot of stress. Why do people get married? Because we find someone who wants to be a student of us. And why do people get unmarried? Because over time the students become teachers and everyone’s teaching but no one’s learning and we forget how to attend to each other.
Good reason for why healthy communities of people are needed to promote healthy marriages, find things that are new to both of you and promote togetherness. Let’s talk physical neighborhood. Sure living in an up-scale neighborhood does not guaranty a healthy marriage, but it can be a promoter of it. Live in a rough neighborhood can possibly do just the opposite. The stressors of worrying about your living situation can add to daily stress, your community is unhealthy and it is hard to not notice or avoid it.
This scenario does affect your mood which can affect your marriage. That does not mean that you cannot have a close tight nit community with-in that community, that happens to. I know some of those couples and families stick together and create the healthiest environment possible. The important thing is their love and support for each other. It doesn’t matter where you live; creating a healthy community or getting plugged into one is totally up to you and your spouse.
Most couples don’t need to become students of marriage; they need to become students of each other again. They need to learn to hold their partner in awareness, without fixing or changing or criticizing or commenting. They need to simply behold their partner, all the quiet beauty, the lovely vulnerability, the fears and the tears, the hurt and the frustration and all the desperate attempts to feel worthy.
To reassure a healthy marriage that represents that, you need a healthy community of people around you who promote that. Husbands don’t be distracted by the nightclub community, wives, watch whatever it is you invest more of your time in. There are dart leagues, pool leagues and bowling leagues all over Wichita Falls, the question is, are you doing it together, does it support and promote healthy marriage.
Sure, we all know that for some “guy time” and “girl time” is important; just make sure that it doesn’t outweigh your marriage time, too much time apart opens the door for a lot of bad things to happen. Check the community of people around you because it does influence your marriage to some degree. Are your ring of people health or not, do they promote healthy marriage or not? Wichita Falls is a great community of people.
More marriage articles: http://www.examiner.com/marriage-in-wichita-falls/jack-lopez