If you're a new employee, say, someone fresh out of college or you just have a new job, here are a few general things I've learned from experience, hearsay, and of course, TV, which is very reliable as we all know. Just kidding.
1) Know where the bathrooms are. Sometimes it's the only place to escape to when you're stressed and need some peace and quiet.
2) Be kind to the maintenance people - they're the only ones who can help you when you lock yourself out of your office.
3) Don't spill your coffee on your desk - management usually frowns on damp office equipment.
4) If you label your lunch and put it in the fridge at work - don't count on it still being there at lunchtime.
5) Electronic label makers are not toys.
6) Plot out restaurants within walking distance beforehand. Google Earth is not necessary for this.
7) Facebook and Twitter are not normally considered productive activities while you're not on break. Unless you have an awesome job.
8) Some people are very attached to their pens and staplers.
9) The boss is always watching, and your co-workers are always listening.
10) Artificial plants do not need to be watered.
A few Christian suggestions to make your workplace a little more bearable:
1) Be kind to the maintenance people - they are not always treated with respect despite their hard work and diligent efforts to keep your office building clean and orderly. Most likely they could use a kind word or friendly conversation every now and then. And remember their names - sometimes that in itself can make someone's day. "An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up." -Proverbs 12:25
2) Bring everyone some Starbucks or muffins one morning; everyone usually needs a pick me up by then. Generosity and genuine kindness are rare these days and will always be appreciated. "Give generously to him and do so without a grudging heart; then because of this the LORD your God will bless you in all your work and in everything you put your hand to." -Deuteronomy 15:9-11
3) Get a bunch of your co-workers together and all pitch in for a nice lunch for your whole office once a month - office morale will go up, and, at least once a month, you'll have a decent lunch. Salty chips, sugary sodas, and chocolate bars are typically not part of the food pyramid.
4) If you must play with your label maker - well, I really don't have a suggestion for that. Just try not to be too creative.
5) Since I actually know of people who are in fact very fond of certain pens and staplers - and, unfortunately, I might even be one of them - please don't steal them. Repercussions in the workplace can get ugly. Or at least annoying.
6) Be respectful to your boss. Even if he or she is a difficult employer, they are still your superior and deserve your respect and hard work. It's not easy to hold your tongue all the time with people like that, but remember, "He who scorns instruction will pay for it, but he who respects a command is rewarded." -Proverbs 13:12-14
7) Your co-workers are always listening - be careful what you say, because it doesn't take much for rumors to start.
8) As for artificial plants - buy a real one and the watering thing will be fixed - it might even brighten up your day as well.
And as always:
"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men." -Colossians 3:22-24