By now we are all aware of the common marriage problems that can destroy the bond between husband and wife. We have heard for years about the in-laws, money, and other issues that often cause divorce, but there are some others that you should be aware of that can mess up a marriage just as bad. It is important to understand what these problems are so that if you recognize them in your own marriage you can take corrective action before it is too late.
1. Too Much Electronic Communication
The busy lifestyles that married couples lead these days forces them to have to use electronic communication more than ever. It is quicker and easier to send a Tweet, email, or Facebook update than it is to pick up the phone and tell someone that you are thinking of them. The problem however, is many couples are relying too heavily on these forms of communication and are not spending enough time having face-to-face conversations. Couples must find a healthy balance between communicating digitally and communicating in person, and when an electronic message must be sent, it is best to learn how to send romantic text messages from relationship expert Michael Fiore in his program Text the Romance Back than it is to use other forms of communication that can seem emotionless.
2. Lack of Sleep
We all know that getting enough sleep is important for your health but it is also important for the health of our marriages. Think about how grumpy and irritable you are when you are tired and how every little thing seems to work your nerves. When you do not get enough sleep you are more likely to get into an intense argument with your spouse, and if you make a habit of not sleeping enough, then you are going to find yourself arguing all the time. If you know that you are irritable from lack of sleep, then the best thing to do is let your spouse know that is the reason you feel argumentative so you can revisit the issue when you have had time to get some beauty rest.
3. Holding Everything in all the Time
What is worse than not getting enough sleep and arguing all the time is, when a couple holds everything in and does not argue at all. This is a sign that couples are not being honest with one another, and it is not good for the health of the marriage or the health of the individuals in the marriage. Holding things in causes people to be more stressed than they should be and it is only a matter of time before someone blows up and the marriage is in big trouble.
4. Movie Star Marriages
Reality television and movies have totally messed up the way people think about marriage these days. This is especially true for women. Sitting around watching how a marriage is portrayed on a movie screen or in a television show only leads to unrealistic expectations. Just because the handsome, muscular actor brings his supermodel wife flowers every day after work and gives her a foot massage every night before she goes to sleep does not mean those are the things that are supposed to happen in your marriage. Many women see these things and think that is how their marriage should be, and when the marriage doesn't turn out that way issues arise. It is important to stop trying to model your marriage after a fairy tale on TV or in the movies and start appreciating it for what it is if you want it to be a success.
5. It’s the Little Things
Far too often these days, married couples get caught up in their busy lifestyles and forget about doing the little things to nurture their relationships. Instead, they plan for a big elaborate vacation once a year hoping that their spouses will appreciate and love them for it. Doing little things like making coffee for your spouse or something else he/she enjoys goes a lot further than that big fancy vacation you have planned. Make a mental note of some of the little things your spouse enjoys and try doing them on a daily basis. You will have a much more rewarding marriage than if you trade in all of the little things for a big vacation once a year.
6. Friends’ Relationships
Thanks to social networks people are more involved than ever in the lives of their friends and family. Sure, you may not see these people on a regular basis but you know what is going on in their lives because it is all over Facebook. When something bad happens such as a friend whose husband cheats on her or a friend whose wife is lying to him, you know about it, and unfortunately, a lot of people start thinking their spouse is going to do those same things to them. You cannot let your friends’ relationships affect your marriage. You have to have the same amount of trust in your spouse that you have always had no matter what goes on in your friends’ lives. If not, then you are setting your marriage up for failure.
7. Bring Back the Romance
Romance is the key ingredient that seems to be missing from a lot of marriages these days. A lot of couples do not make time for those romantic dinners, date nights, and other gestures the way they did in the beginning of their marriages. Romance is absolutely vital in order for any marriage to survive. It is important to put the spark back into your marriage if you feel it is missing. Get out of the house every once in a while and go on a date. Just because you are married does not mean date night goes away! Do romantic things for each other such as leave sweet notes for your spouse, buy a card to let your spouse know you are thinking of him/her, or send romantic text messages that let your spouse know he/she is on your mind. Whatever it is you do, make sure to keep the romance in your marriage alive if you want your marriage to be a success.