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6 Easy Ways To Meet Your Valentine

Valentine’s Day heart window displayed in Elizabeth NJ.
Valentine’s Day heart window displayed in Elizabeth NJ.
Julio Ibarra

You haven’t been feeling any heat between the sheets lately. Now, whose fault is that? If your answer is, "yes, it’s my fault", then it’s time for you to turn-on that furnace on Valentines Day. Just to think that there are millions of single people right outside of your door (I know, you've heard that before) that want to meet you, and you are too afraid to meet them, or at least meet just one or two, hey who’s counting.

I am sure you are asking yourself: “What could I be possibly be doing wrong?” Nothing that is the problem, and I am certain of that, “that you are doing nothing about it”. I am looking into my crystal ball: you are sitting at home all alone comfy on your favorite sofa watching a romantic DVD on TV. You are frustrated feeling a little lonely and guilt you look around as if someone is there but no one is, then with a little shy glance you pet your pussy, until it hisses in despair or you through your dog a bone and smack him until you go blind, your poor dog (don’t blame your pets for you despair).

Sure, you are thinking: “what is wrong with that?” After all, you have plastered your attractive self on not just one, but also, ten of those top-match-making websites! Yet, it is not cutting it for you any longer you feel. Maybe it never has and never will. You have no clue as to what to do, and why no one would like to meet you, or even contact you.

Many of us have what I call that, “super low self esteem”. It is running our lives 24-7. Really, with our family and friends we sometimes value ourselves a little more, we do. No ifs or buts about it, we are worth much more than anyone can imagine. But, only when our families and friends surround us.

Yes, there are some of us that would rather be alone. However, deep inside any human being, we really need someone special to hold, love and swap a little spit even. Come-on it is all good, extremely good. There is nothing in the world like spending that little quality time with someone. After all, the inflatable toy and that other sing-a-ma-jig that you keep in your draw isn’t planning to take you out and show you around town, nor will it keep you warm at night. What, did they make a heater on those things? Then don’t read any further.

Top 6 ways to meet a valentine:

1. The grocery store. Great place to meet someone, act as if you need help. Bump someone’s hand, while choosing fruit, and vegetables. In the middle of an isle, ask if they can read or reach something for you. Thinking of a recipe, ask: “Hey, excuse me, but would you happen to know what goes in this,_____?” I hope you get the picture.
2. Clothes shopping, this is great one. Asking someone what do they think of the sunglasses or the blouse, shirt, pants and dress you have picked out. Get it, start some dialog.
3. Bookstores (if you can find one these days) seem to have worked the best for me. “Hey, have you read this one?” If you start with that line in the cookbook section, that’s not a swift move. Look-up some recipes, just read it out loud, “be fearless, do it”. Or comment, “I tried this recipe, and it didn’t turn out the way the book, I did everything it said, and I followed it word per word and crossed my ‘t’ too.” Just whatever you do, don’t laugh to yourself and look around, bad move (that’s the sign of your crazy).
4. Adult night classes, now that’s a great place. Not only will you know you’ll meet someone as studious as you, but they’ll have set goals too as you. Live improvement, dreams, and inspiration for a better life, maybe? Whatever the case maybe, adult night classes, that gets a five star point from me as being the best place for a great date.
5. There are also social clubs (get-up and find one) that you can join and they offer after work gatherings and then there’s your local YMCA that’ll have after work sporting events and activities too. If you go to a big league game, don’t expect to find anyone there, those people are paying big bucks, and they are there to watch the game. Not a good spot for a pick-up.
6. Bars, I love bars. How not to find a drunk in a bar, that’ll be my next book. If you are in a bar and you are going at it solo. Then take it from the master scope out the bar before sitting down and shouting out for a drink. Don’t settle up in a spot and then set your eye on the target, not a cool move, it’s typical. Walk past the bar eyeing the empty stools spotting your target, “capow”, you got it. You sit right next to them measure up how many drinks they are getting. Then work it from there. If they are guzzling the drinks as if it were water, then it’s time for you to move it along to the next place, but don’t you get drunk.

This is just a small tip before meeting Ms. or Mrs. right. Always check for that wedding band first. Guys, we are notorious for not checking first. Keep in mind: that not all women are bored with their husband. You might feel as if you are a hottie that’ll get lucky, but in the long run, someone will get hurt. Ladies, well, most have an eye out for the band on the finger, and keep to their normal home grown values (I hope) with them, unless well, they are really looking to break-up a marriage. Then let there be a lesson learned: he left her for you, and he’ll leave you for someone else too at some point, oh yeah.

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