Being in a relationship with someone in a fraternity is not always easy. The fraternity always comes first, there are lots of scheduling conflicts; and occasional bouts of jealousy are not uncommon. It takes a special kind of girl to be a fraternity girlfriend. While you may not necessarily have to be part of the Greek commmunity, understanding its idiosyncrasies can certainly help alleviate the unique set of challenges that come with dating a fraternity guy. Regardless of your Greek or non-Greek affiliation, the key to being a fraternity girlfriend is learning to manage inevitable feelings of jealousy while remaining supportive of his fraternal duties and maintaining a life of your own outside the relationship.
Fraternity Girlfriend Guide
Tip #1: Accept his Greek lifestyle and respect the loyalty he has to his fraternity. When a guy joins a fraternity, a special bond is created during the pledge process that makes him loyal to his brothers first and foremost. The added responsibilities that come with fraternity membership will also keep him fairly busy. “A girl may wonder why her guy never has time for her, but always has time to be involved with some event that his fraternity is involved in,” says Joseph Marcus, a founding member of his fraternity and author of “If Your Girlfriends Know So Much Then Why Are They Still Single? Over 101 Tips On How To Attract And Keep A Good Man". It can sometimes put a strain on the relationship when the needs of his fraternity come before yours.
Tip #2: Realize that he chose to date you instead of someone else. Although he may be exposed to other women through his fraternity events, you were the one to capture his affection. Something about you made him more interested in you than any other girl. If he didn't want to be with you, then you probably wouldn't be together in the first place.
Tip #3: Keep jealousy from getting the best of you. You may not always be invited to all his events, particularly those that involve mixers or exchanges with other sororities. This can make some girlfriends feel uncomfortable knowing he'll be around other women all the time. This is part of the territory when you date a fraternity guy, but a little bit of jealousy can actually be a good thing. Too much jealousy, however, can leave a guy feeling smothered. "No guy wants a clingy girlfriend," says Marcus.
Tip #4: Get involved with his fraternity whenever you can. Attend every social function he invites you to and support his fraternity's philanthropy by donating your time, perhaps even your cooking or baking skills. This will give you a chance to get to know some of his brothers and even make friends with some of the other girlfriends.
Tip #5: Have hobbies and interests outside your relationship. Participate in other activities happening on campus and spend more time with friends. This will allow you you enjoy your college experience so much more without the constant worry of what you're boyfriend is doing without you. Let him wonder what you're doing without him instead.
Consider joining a sorority if you are not already a member of one. The challenges associated with dating anyone in the Greek community works both ways, but there's also a mutual understanding regarding similar responsibilities each must face respectively within their organizations. Also keep in mind that gossip spreads through the Greek community like wildfire so chose who you date wisely and keep your relationship woes between yourselves if you don't want everyone knowing your business.