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12 Days of Christmas - College Admission Style

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This time of year in the college admission cycle the students, counselors and college admissions officers are all feeling the stress of the busy season. What follows is a bit of college admissions inspired humor loosely tied to the English Christmas carol "The Twelve Days of Christmas."

The Twelve Days of College Admissions

On the first day of admissions the admissions gods gave to me one correctly submitted college application.

On the second day of admissions a student gave to me two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the third day of admissions the college admission officers gave to me three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the fourth day of admissions The College Board gave to me four or more colleges to which students should apply, three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the fifth day of admissions the overworked college representative gave to me his list of the day’s five high school visits, four or more colleges to which students should apply, three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the sixth day of admissions the application reviewers gave points to six Insight Resume questions, a list of the day’s five high school visits, four or more colleges to which students should apply, three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the seventh day of admission the college counselor gave seven sections for SAT testing, points to six Insight Resume questions, a list of the day’s five high school visits, four or more colleges to which students should apply, three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the eighth day of admission the director of admissions gave the eighth weekday for staff to rest (oh, there isn’t one?), seven sections for SAT testing, points to six Insight Resume questions, a list of the day’s five high school visits, four or more colleges to which students should apply, three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the ninth day of admission the student submitted nine applications at 11:59pm on the night of the deadline, the eighth weekday for staff to rest (oh, there isn’t one?), seven sections for SAT testing, points to six Insight Resume questions, a list of the day’s five high school visits, four or more colleges to which students should apply, three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the tenth day of admission the college admission officer gave ten hours to reading files, submitted nine applications at 11:59pm on the night of the deadline, the eighth weekday for staff to rest (oh, there isn’t one?), seven sections for SAT testing, points to six Insight Resume questions, a list of the day’s five high school visits, four or more colleges to which students should apply, three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the eleventh day of admission the college mail room gave up because they were more than eleven days behind in inputting incoming applications, ten hours to reading files, submitted nine applications at 11:59pm on the night of the deadline, the eighth weekday for staff to rest (oh, there isn’t one?), seven sections for SAT testing, points to six Insight Resume questions, a list of the day’s five high school visits, four or more colleges to which students should apply, three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

On the twelfth day of admissions the Common Application gave to me twelve different error messages, eleven days behind in inputting incoming applications, ten hours to reading files, submitted nine applications at 11:59pm on the night of the deadline, the eighth weekday for staff to rest (oh, there isn’t one?), seven sections for SAT testing, points to six Insight Resume questions, a list of the day’s five high school visits, four or more colleges to which students should apply, three or less references per applicant, two days’ notice for a recommendation letter and one correctly submitted application.

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