Seasons of "What if"

BALTIMORE (Map, News) - Second-guessing is the real national pastime for sports fans, and baseball is a second-guesser's paradise. What if the Red Sox hadn't sold Babe Ruth?

What if Joe DiMaggio hadn't been robbed of a hit to end his wondrous 56-game hitting streak? What if Bill Buckner hadn't flubbed Mookie Wilson's grounder in the 1986 World Series? It's an endless list that stirs barroom debates and talk show arguments. With the Orioles mired in their 10th straight losing season, staff writer and columnist Matt Palmer has a few baseball "what ifs" of his own.

>> What if ... the Orioles had never traded Curt Schilling, Pete Harnisch and Steve Finley for 'slugger' Glenn Davis in 1991? Five World Series titles might be an understatement. OK, so maybe that's an overstatement. There is no trade more rued in Baltimore than this one. The deal no doubt changed the course of the Orioles organization. Schilling is a possible Hall of Famer, Finley was a five-time Gold Glove outfielder and two-time All-Star, and Harnisch, an All-Star in 1991, won 95 games after leaving the Orioles. Davis? Twenty-four homers in three seasons with the Orioles. Ugh.

>> What if ... the Orioles hadn't fired manager Cal Ripken Sr. six games into the infamous 21-game losing streak that started the 1988 season? Well, you can put a new coat of paint on a Ford Pinto, but it¹s still a Ford Pinto. That team was meant to lose that many games. Joe Torre, Tom Kelly, Earl Weaver, Tony La Russa and a reincarnated Connie Mack all could have been in the dugout at the same time during that woeful April, and the Orioles still would have lost those 21 games.

>> What if ... the Orioles gave Ravens head coach Brian Billick a one-game contract as manager? Simply put, the news conference after the game would be legendary.

>> What if ... Baltimore finally said, "Enough is enough! Keep those damned Yankee and Red Sox fans out of Camden Yards?" I don't have an answer for that, but it would be cool to see Orioles fans take ownership of their stadium for once.

>> What if ... right field umpire Rich Garcia called Derek Jeter out for fan interference in the 1996 American League Championship Series? When Yankees fan Jeffrey Maier reached out and took a warning-track catch away from Tony Tarasco, it wrecked everything. The Orioles would have won that game, the ALCS and the World Series. The modern-day Yankees empire never would have been born, which means you would have a lot fewer local people claiming they're Yankees fans because their grandfather once ate pizza in the Bronx.

>> What if ... the Orioles stopped playing John Denver¹s "Thank God I'm a Country Boy" during the seventh-inning stretch? Sometimes, tradition needs to be taken out back and put out of its misery. This is one of those cases. A major East Coast city breaking down in a hoedown is one of those squirm-inducing moments that make many fans stay away from the ballpark. In fact, I¹m pretty sure that¹s what is keeping people away now, not nine straight years of losing.

>> What if ... the next time an Orioles pitcher cries that his pitch count is too high at 90, someone reminds him of Zip Zabel? Zabel, a Cubs relief pitcher, came into a June 1915 game with two outs in the first and pitched the rest of a 19-inning game. That's a record for relievers that's safe - forever.

>> What if ... Cal Ripken Jr. had sat out a game after injuring his knee during a June 1993 brawl with the Mariners? Cal's pursuit of Lou Gehrig's streak would have ended, and baseball never would have been saved. Non-sports like poker would be on heavy rotation on ESPN (wait, that still happened), and table tennis would be the country's most popular sport. Oh, and I would have married Jessica Alba. Don't ask me how that relates to Cal¹s streak. Just indulge me, please.

>> What if ... Erik Bedard showed more than a passing interest in talking with the media? The short answer is, the Orioles ace would be a huge star around town. When he doesn't bail on post-game news conferences, he rolls his eyes at questions and generally offers one-word answers. Now that manager Dave Trembley is busting his chops about talking, here's to interviewing a really smart guy.

>> What if ... the Orioles put the word "Baltimore" back on their road jerseys? It's a no-brainer: The Orioles will win 100 games, take the AL East, cure baldness and bring about world peace. And they will sell more jerseys, guaranteed. You'll be able to shell out 120 bucks for a jersey you¹ll never see used at Camden Yards.

>> What if ... MASN programmed in high definition? The four noisy people who have HD will be happy, I guess. Until some other technology rolls around. The rest of us will watch in normal ignorant bliss and be happy with it.

>> What if ... the power-deprived Orioles had thrown in everything and the kitchen sink to sign Vladimir Guerrero three years ago? Well, for one, the Orioles probably wouldn¹t be on the verge of putting Brandon Fahey into the cleanup spot. And second, that new hotel past center field would get nailed on a regular basis. AND, the Orioles probably would be competing for the AL East.

>> What if ... Alex Rodriguez opts out of his contract in the offseason and signs with the Orioles? Here¹s one guarantee: Wives with profane T-shirts would increase by 100 percent at Camden Yards.

>> What if ... the Orioles had shuttled the idea of getting "bullpen help" in the offseason and thrown in another kitchen sink to nab Alfonso Soriano? Blown leads still would have been on the menu, but at least they'd be entertaining.

>> What if ... the Orioles can turn this into a season of "Why not?"

mpalmer@baltimoreexaminer.com

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