You love your partner, but there’s this shaggy, snarling interloper who continues to block your way to relationship bliss. No, not your mother-in-law, but your significant other’s significant four-legged other: the pet. She’s had kitty Mr. Twinkles since she was a coed. He’s had bulldog Bruno since Bush Senior was in office. Too bad they slobber all over your Armani suit or use your purse as a chew toy. Is “love me, love my pet” an impossibility?

DAN: No; in fact, an annoying pet offers a great litmus test for the strength of your relationship. I’ve found that if I really care about someone, the pet doesn’t really matter, even if it is Cujo. Chances are if your girlfriend’s yip-yip-yippy lap-lint-pile is enough to send you packing, you will have found some other excuse to exit soon enough.

JOAN: Pet etiquette can be a challenge. My friend Marc has low tolerance for pets and their owners, especially when it comes down to hygiene. When his date asked him up for coffee, he gladly accepted. Then the lady’s cat jumped up on the kitchen table, stuck its head in the pitcher of milk, took a few licks, and his date smiled approvingly. Marc took the hint and high-tailed (no pun intended) out, never to see the lady again.

DAN: Pets can be easier to bear among friends. One pal has a wonderful, loving cat who, sadly, had the annoying tendency to lick everything, including my dress pants. It’s embarrassing to have to explain I need spot stain remover for cat spit.

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I lost one friend because she, by her own admission, placed animals above people. I was visiting her and her husband when her dog got locked in their car the morning they were to have given me a ride to the airport. I later learned she was very upset because she felt I hadn’t done enough to help.

Was I to have torn through someone else’s home, opening drawers and going through closets looking for the spare car key? And never mind that now I had to rush to get a taxi so I didn’t miss my flight. The whole incident ultimately ended our friendship.

JOAN: If you’ve ever owned a pet, you know how easy it is to get emotionally attached. When I adopted Shiloh, a beagle mixed diva, I soon fell in love and carted her everywhere — to a July 4th fireworks party at my friend Janet’s, to the Friday night movies in Little Italy, even to the beach for a weekend. So I know how difficult it was for Theresa, 29, a physician, to give up her standard poodle, Manu, when she called off her engagement.

“My fiance and I decided to get a standard poodle because I’m allergic to many breeds, and he wanted a large dog. We researched it carefully and drove hours in search of a pet. We finally found Manu, whom we named after a Spanish singer we both liked. We loved Manu because he wasn’t totally pure; he had white markings on his chest, so he was considered an outcast by breeders. The first two weeks we had him he had a bad reaction to his vaccinations, and we thought we were going to lose him. He was lethargic and wouldn’t eat, but he pulled through. He was our son, and we loved him.”

Then four months after adopting Manu, Theresa and her fiance broke up. Theresa says, “It was my decision to break up. I gave Paul the dog because I felt like it was the fair thing to do. Originally he had moved to the Midwest to be with me. Now I was creating more changes, and I didn’t want to take Manu away from him too.”

My advice to couples with dogs/pets after a breakup is wait a few days to a few weeks to decide who gets custody. Don’t do it right after the breakup because you can’t make rational decisions. Wait until your emotions settle.

Dan Collins is a terminally single 40-something writer and local PR maven. Joan Allen is a noted matchmaker extraordinaire and author of “Celebrating Single and Getting Love Right: From Stalemate to Soulmate.”