Abusive relationships among preteens growing

WASHINGTON (Map, News) - Washington-area schools are looking to combat the growing problem of abusive relationships among students as young as 11, whose sexual exploits are often hidden from parents’ eyes by personal cell phones and the Internet.

One curriculum titled “Love Is Not Abuse” was released Tuesday in conjunction with a survey that seeks to expose the problem, especially among the 11- to 14-year-old “tween” demographic, so called for their precarious status between childhood and teenaged years. The nationwide survey was commissioned by Liz Claiborne Inc. and its National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline.

Nearly 30 percent of the more than 1,000 tweens who completed the survey said that sex and oral sex were considered a part of their age group’s relationships. Of those who said they were in a relationship, 16 percent reported knowing a peer who’d been hurt by an angry partner, 15 percent knew a peer who’d been pressured into having sex, and 13 percent knew a peer who’d been pressured into oral sex. Once they reached high school, abusive relationships were far more prevalent among students who started having sex before age 14.

“Walk through school hallways and just about every student has a cell [phone], and that gives them 24-7 access to each other,” said Kimberly Hurley, an education specialist for the Alexandria Office on Women. “And it’s a lot easier to do that without any parental knowledge,” Hurley said, adding that the ease in privately harassing students helped lead her department to develop an “Expect Respect” curriculum used in the city’s schools.

Due to legislation passed in 2007, this fall marks the first time all Virginia schools need to include dating violence in their health curriculum.

“Dating starts earlier now because of the increase in communication and the media influence and because kids are maturing faster,” said Debbie DeFranco, coordinator of Arlington County schools’ health classes. DeFranco said parents should feel more comfortable checking their students’ cell phone and Internet interactions.

“While some kids may feel ‘that’s a violation of my privacy,’ others actually crave that structure,” DeFranco said.

lfabel@dcexaminer.com